Annie's Song

CW - domestic abuse and murder
A poem inspired by a lady I met on the women's aid forum over a decade ago. This is her story, we do not know if she is dead, we just know she disappeared after promising us she'd let us know if she escaped.
In the UK alone an average of 2 women a week die at the hands of current or former partners. This is on the rise due to cuts to funding of escape services such as refuges.

Annie's Song

I don't know where to begin. 
My name I guess, I'm Annie, 
My husband abuses me, 

My husband, controls me, 
I'm only allowed out once a week, to shop.
He times my shopping trips, 

My husband controls me,  
He decides when I can have my medication, 
I have epilepsy you see. 

My husband controls me, 
He will trigger my seizures, 
Only he knows where my rescue medication is, 

My husband controls me, 
He discovered my attempt to escape, 
I had a major seizure, 

My husband controls me, 
My husband didn't give my medicine, 
My husband watched me die. 

Battles internal

Battles internal

Each day is a battle,

One I must win,

My troops are lined up,

My strategies in place,

What if my troops fail?

What if my strategies aren't up to par?

Will my blood run?

The battle is won today,

The troops are well,

My strategies worked out,

No blood yet runs,

Each day is a battle,

One I must win,

My troops are lined up,

My strategies in place,

What if my troops fail?

What if my strategies aren't up to par?

Will my blood run?

The battle was a draw today,

The troops are tired,

My strategy warn,

Still no blood yet runs,

Each day is a battle,

One I must win,

My troops are lined up,

My strategies in place,

What if my troops fail?

What if my strategies aren't up to par?

Will my blood run?

My troops are down,

My strategy is done,

My blood is run.

#Suicideawarenessday

Silence and truth - poem

CW - abuse and rape.

Silence and Truth 

Silence is where our abusers thrive, 
Silence is where our rapists live, 
Silence is their freedom, 
Silence is our imprisonment, 

Truth is where our abusers wither, 
Truth is where our rapists cease, 
Truth is their imprisonment, 
Truth is our freedom, 

Our words are our swords, 
Our words are our shields, 
Our truths will set us all free,
Truth is our emancipation, 

I'm your Father

CW paternal abuse

A poem designed to be read aloud. The first line in each verse is from my father and is spoken in a cadence sing-song type voice "I'm - your - fa-th-er - show- me -some - respect." The second line of each verse is from me.

I'm your Father

I'm your father show me some respect, 
I only asked if you'd like a cup of tea

I'm your father show me some respect, 
I only asked if you wanted to go out

I'm your father show me some respect, 
I only asked you to stop shouting at me

I'm your father show me some respect, 
I only asked you to stop kicking me, 

I'm your father show me some respect, 
You're killing me. 

Old poem I found from nearly 20 years ago

This is a poem I wrote a very long time ago when I was recovering, somewhat, from a major mental health breakdown due to paternal abuse. It is raw, but I find it a very fitting milestone for how far down the road of recovery I have since come. It comes with major content warnings for recovery and mental ill health and abuse. 

                        Lost


Your toxic poison is killing me,
I no longer know how to be,

I am lost in your sinking pit of poison,
Suffocating, I can't see,
I can't escape,
Am I me or am I you?

I've been told I'm like you from birth,
It must be true,
Yet, in my depths I know, I think,

No, that is the poison doing it's evil work,
I am me and you are you,

Epiphanically, I see the answer I seek is here,
Within me.

The Crickets Ball - poem

The Crickets Ball


The crickets in their top hats, and gowns,
the grasshopper orchestra playing the waltz

The fireflies lighting the ways,
Jasmine and honeysuckle garlands don the halls

The crickets ball has begun. 

Living her Truth

Living her truth

She was living her truth,
Her name was Bee Love,

She enjoyed a party, a dance, a giggle,
She loved a movie, a Netflix binge,

She was brave, she lived her truth,
A woman in all her bravery and strength,

Bigots, racist transphobes, burned her alive, to silence her truth,
Trans black women aren't allowed to exist you see.

Say her name, speak her truth,
Keep her alive in love