Hello again depression ...

Welcome back depression.

It's odd how even though it has been years I've been feeling the onset for a while but recently it's been like a flood of darkness. Can't share the main reason for the depression at the moment, although I certainly shall do so when it is safe to do so.

It is scary, perhaps most particularly because when battling with depression before I was at home and had my lovely brother and my dogs to help me along. Here I am a little out on a limb. Yes I have handsome, and a new friend who is proving to be very warm and nice, but still it's not the same as having that safety net.

So today after work to the GP and out spilled the whole mess, so again taking Fluoxetine (Prozac) and coping skills toolkit has been opened.

Feels a bit weird to be down here again, I just hope I've caught myself just in time and sought help before things get too far downwards.

So anyway I thought I'd write a bit in a general sort of way on this blog, for my own healing and coping. Give it a try, a sort of cyber thought journal. If I don't like it, and I may not as I'm quite private, then I'll just stop and drift away ...

I am currently finding alot of solace and wisdom in the Memoirs of Arthur Ashe (the tennis player) ... although as I wrote this blog I kept drifting of into this poem - one of my Mum's long time favourite poems ...

THE LAKE ISLE OF INNISFREE

by William Butler Yeats

I will arise and go now, and go to Innisfree,
And a small cabin build there, of clay and wattles made;
Nine bean rows will I have there, a hive for the honeybee,
And live alone in the bee-loud glade.

And I shall have some peace there, for peace comes dropping slow,
Dropping from the veils of the morning to where the cricket sings;
There midnight's all a-glimmer, and noon a purple glow,
And evening full of the linnet's wings.
I will arise and go now, for always night and day
I hear lake water lapping with low sounds by the shore;
While I stand on the roadway, or on the pavements gray,
I hear it in the deep heart's core.